I walked into the lounge, hoping this New Years would be different. First doomed idea was agreeing to a blind date. Of all the days to try out a blind date, I must have been desperate to get out the house.
If this strapless bra doesn’t start cooperating, it’s coming off.
Aww hell, I can’t, then this guy will know the girl aren’t perky.
This is some bullshit.
Alright, I need a martini STAT to get over these thoughts.
“What do you recommend? You know what? Surprise me.”
This bartender was cute, and he grinned and nodded back. Note to self, if this guy doesn’t show or doesn’t work, get the bartender’s number.
He came back with this. I drank this liquid and I was so happy for some reason. I think it was because it tastes like candy. In my mind, I was at home in my pjs, eating…….truffles. That’s it! Truffles!
“What is this? It’s fabulous!”
“I call it a Butterscotch Truffle Martini”, he grinned.
“Let me know if you need anything”.
This guy really is trying tonight. Can’t knock the guy for trying, right?
I sat sipping on this creation, making sure I didn’t get too drunk waiting, and about half way into the martini, I got a text from the blind date
‘I’m running late, I’m so sorry’
He better not stand me up. I could be at home in flannels. It’s not all too bad, I’m watching Mr. Cute Bartender at work. More people have arrived, and he’s rocking out behind the bar.
Time pasted, and the bar wasn’t full but getting to the point I was ready to leave. As I’m getting ready to text one of my friends to come out to dance with me, I see this hand in front of my phone. Well manicured, and rugged if possible, of course it was cute bartender.
“Still no show?”
“Yeah, thinking it’s a stood up date, text the BFF to come out and dance with me”
“Here, take this, on the house. No pretty classy woman like yourself should be stood up on New Years Eve”.
“Aww, that’s sweet. Too bad you have to work”.
He walked away grinning, and I just about melted. A b-52 shot too?! Apparently, he knew the way to my heart and some other stuff too. I took that shot like a pro, and text my dancing buddy. She told me she was on her way. I made my way to the dance floor for a little bit in my own world, forgetting the jackass who stood me up, and everything else. Just me and the music, right?
So I thought…….
I felt a hand on my shoulder. How this chick got there so fast is beyond me! She had her favorite drink for me to drink and dance with her. This Brandy Alexander is ok, but she swears by them, and if I didn’t love her, she would have got the side looks and rejection really quick.
“How the hell you get here so fast?”
“I was prepared. I told you the blind date idea was a bust. Forget it, just shake that ass and fuck him!”
I heart her so much.
I don’t know how long we were dancing, but we needed more numbing juice for these heels. Again, why did I do that. I’m paying for this tomorrow for sure. Making our way back to the bar, it was cute bartender and a female bartender working the bar, and the help was needed. It wasn’t packed, but it was busy. I didn’t expect the BFF to notice cute bartender, or for him to remember me at this point.
“The chick bartender, I’m getting a number by the end of the night”.
“You know bartenders and customers don’t end well”.
“You assume that, each person is different”.
“Alright, and how many have you slept with?”
“Yeah, yeah. Fuck you too dry spell”.
I laughed at her. She knows I’m right, but I wanted to see if it was true, especially with cute bartender over here. She orders drinks, and again, I don’t know what the hell she ordered, but the cute bartender grinned at the order.
“Your friend here is hilarious. Glad she could make it out. I saw you two dancing, save me a dance later?”
“I could, but don’t expect anything”.
“Just a dance and conversation”.
I swear that grin could melt the panties away in a hurry! Damn it, I was supposed to just have fun, but getting drunk and bothered. I swear, plans never got accordingly. He came back with drink I never seen before. This heffa always orders something ‘exotic’, and I use that term loosely. Last time we ordered something like this, I ended up 100 miles away from my house hungover and eating cold pizza in a hotel. We still don’t remember that night at all. A whole new meaning to white girl wasted.
“The hell is this?”
“Just drink it!”
“Um no, what is this?”
“Apple tart martini, she said she wanted a drink with apples in it. My girl over here created it. You two are the first to try it, tell her what you think?”
We took sips from the glass, and it was like I had the fried fatty apple pie from McDonalds in a glass. This chick was good.
When the BFF gives the wooooo like Ric Flair, it’s fabulous. As long as she didn’t do the strut right there, we should be ok.
Welp. Spoke too soon. She’s buzzed.
The female bartender came over to she this crazy heffa do her impression, and all I could do was shake my head and grin. If I ever was in doubt of coming out tonight, this chick made it all go away.
“She thinks your cute”.
“I can tell, that’s why you two got the drink. Give her this and enjoy. I get off around 3”.
Wait a damn minute. This chick gets digits from a Ric Flair strut? Again, I grin, and shove the card in my purse. We downed the drink pretty quick, and back to the floor. Whatever the drink had in it kept us going.
“You got the digits from that lame as strut you did”.
I handed her the card, and she grinned. I casually looked around to see if a guy was looking for me. Nothing. It was really starting to sink in, I got stood up. I mean I’m not bad looking, and I have a great personality, on my on, and intelligent. The fuck was wrong with me.
“I see the look of tears. No not tonight. Piss on that shit and walk away, his fucking loss, not yours. I’ll be back, we need to get ready for the ball to drop, or maybe in his case balls, who knows, the night ain’t over yet! WOOOOOOO BITCHES”.
In her own way, she made me feel better, dysfunctional and all. Again, I heart this chick.
She came back with another martini, and this one was different, the liquid looks familiar. Was it what I think it was? If it was, I knew she was my BFF for a reason.
“I got your damned egg nog martini. Ugh…..but you drank my brandy alexander, so I can put up with this one”.
I squealed like a 5 year old on Christmas eve. Had colored sugar on the rim, and just beautiful. Drinking and licking the sugar away, I was happy. Tonight may not have gone the way I wanted it too, but it was great none the less.
As I cam back to reality, they were on 8.
I felt a hand on my shoulder. Someone just whipped me around and kissed me like no tomorrow.
I just about fainted.
“Sorry I was running late, I told your BFF I had to work, but she insisted that I try this blind date thing anyway”.
“Wait, you’re the…..”
“That would be me”.
I wanted to kill her and hug her at the same time, was that possible? We danced while my BFF flirted with the female bartender. Best new years I had to date.