Mother’s Day Thoughts

As Mother’s Day approaches, I’m still battling walking pneumonia. In good spirits, but so tired and restless. Not to mention the work I’m missing from being sick. 

I’m better today, but we are back at the doctor’s office for a follow up since this horrendous cough won’t stop. I also have cataract surgery in a week, if this goes away. 

As I was on my way to the office, I had my music on shuffle, and it was perfect timing that these songs blared through my speakers back to back.

 

Both tend to uplift me for different reasons. 

The first one, my mom bought this when it was first released. At the time we were living in Riverdale, Georgia. Just her, myself and my brother. I was in middle school, and trying to stay sane as a preteen. My mom was a single parent to two kids with no family around. Prior to moving, she began to get really sick, long winded, and just tired.

It got worse as we moved down south, and we grew up fast. It wasn’t all doom and gloom though. My brother began to play baseball and take taekwondo lessons. I began my violin lessons, so off we’d go to different activities.

We would drive in our Ford Taurus station wagon, and listen to this song. It was calming. It reassured us that we would be ok. As time went on, we got a name for it. 

Sarcoidosis. She had this disease that mirrors Lupus but slightly different. Yet, another lung disease that caught our family. In any event, it didn’t stop her. My mom still cracked jokes, chastised us when needed, provided, and continued school. 

I listened to this driving to my appointment in awe, thinking, ‘now I understand why she pushes through’. You just have to. It’s not for ego or pride. It’s for the little people watching. They are learning through your determination to keep trying. 

Bring that to now, I’m tired, worn, broke, and exhausted. I didn’t want to get up today. Hell, it’s the first time for mother’s day I don’t really want to do anything. But I will. It’s not for me. It’s for my crew. They want to do something for me. 

Which is what I get from the second song. 

‘I got loyalty and royalty inside my DNA’.

No truer statement. Even as I sit here sick, my crew have helped me so much. They are here for the long haul, and that means I did my job right. I’ll go home to get myself together for tonight, and check on them. 

To all you mommies out there who are tired or just not feeling this holiday, it’s not really about you. It’s about you being appreciated. That for one day, your family wants to honor and appreciate you. Let them. Even if it’s so cheesy or cheap. It’s the thought that counts. 

For those who’s mom have passed on, start a tradition of honoring her. She may not be here physically, but in different ways, she shines through you and everything she’s touched. 

Not a mom yet? Go find one and hug her. She may be going through some shit, and needs a shoulder to lean on. You never know. 

Everyone have a great holiday this Sunday. We are going out to dinner. Because this mom is not cooking(for once) and just enjoying the company! 

~CSM~

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